Childwise

When I was a kid I remember playing with my friend’s games like Tag. And, if I were tagged I remember saying “No Fair! Do over!”  Childhood allows do-overs. If a child does not like their situation they don’t cry about it. They simply have a Do-Over!

Why can’t grownups learn from the wisdom of a child.

When you don’t like your life instead of crying or complaining about the circumstance. Do-Over! What I mean to eliminate any confusion; is you can’t erase the parts you don’t like. But you can do them over so that you do like them and get better results.

Children don’t care if you’re tall or what color skin

Children don’t care if you’re tall or what color skin you have or ethnicity. At age seventeen I had a black boyfriend and nothing made me happier than to sneak into his dormitory. I hung out with him and his friends despite the warnings of all the Benedictine nuns! Who swore I’d go to a very hot place, but I like hot weather! So what was the harm?

When I was a kid it’s amazing how anger dissipates as quickly as it came.

One time I would call up my friend Pam and ask her “Are you listening?”

“Yeah!” she’d respond. To which she would hear a dial tone.

She and I played that game for about fifteen maybe twenty minutes before she got bored. I forgot what started the whole thing, then we were laughing on the phone for three hours.

As adults we tend to not be so forgiving

As adults we tend to not be so forgiving when we are offended. Unlike my phone situation with Pam, we take things more personally than children do.  Children are gifts from the Gods. They have a deep insight that as we age if we don’t nurture it we lose it!

Children have a deep insight

Children have a deep insight which is why they talk to fairies and have invisible playmates. I remember one time my mom entered my room and asked who I was talking to. I gave her the name of someone and pointed next to me, but all my mom saw was air and said “There’s no one there”. I laughed and pointed again thinking like me. She was able to see my friend. But sadly she saw no one of the sort her intuition was blocked. By using so much logic at her job that she did not see anything.

I also remember I  played Wonder Woman as a child. I would spin around imagine myself in that cool outfit with bullet proof bracelets. Able to fly over  cars and throw men like rag dolls.

Kids can access another part of their brains where they have an out of body experience. And feel a sense of extreme joy!  Because they know that they are more than what everyone sees.

Grownups lose this! We talk to kids as if they don’t understand, when they understand a lot more than grownups do!

The next time you find yourself in a situation where you feel offended

The next time you find yourself in a situation where you feel offended by someone ask yourself. Travel to your childhood and place the same situation to the childhood you. Ask them what would they do?  Then listen with your heart not your head!

I asked my childhood self what she would do about a situation that had troubled me for some time regarding a teacher of mine.

I saw her bouncing a ball on the floor. Then she looked at me and said “So what she’s a big meanie I don’t like meanies I like you. Why don’t you have some ice cream and forget about her!”

I actually thought that was a great idea! Now I need the ice cream but I said she’s right! That woman is a meanie and why am I wasting my energy thinking of her.  Then I suggested Doug go buy some ice cream!

Children hold the key to happiness

Children hold the key to happiness, because they are the architects of happiness. They know what they like who they like and when someone is mean they are honest.  Also, they don’t play politics!

They come out and say what they are thinking.

One time I was at Bethesda Naval hospital and in the elevator with my dad was a naval officer he was about six feet if not taller. I was about nine years old and I pulled on his pant legs he looked down at me and said “Yes?” So, I looked at him and said “You’re very cute!”

I was not afraid oh god what will he think? No!  He was tall and gorgeous and I wanted him to know I thought so!

We lose that honesty as we age because then we replace it with fear and politics. That’s why no one knows what anyone else is thinking.

I remember being a child and telling another child “I don’t like you, you’re mean!”  Or saying will you be my friend!?”  When I liked someone.

Adults play poker in real life, they put on a poker face don’t show how they feel

Adults play poker in real life. They put on a poker face don’t show how they feel and pretend to have a full house!

Seriously!  Go back to kindergarten learn something of value. In kindergarten kids don’t care if one is from another country or if another is the son of gay parents. They just want someone to color with and have juice with.

Grownups become consumed with work, money, kids, relationships, bills, family in-laws and so much more!

Kids just play and when they’re bored they go to the next thing that makes them happy, which is why they have so much energy.

Grownups are like a witch’s cauldron full of water. On the stove turned to high! After a while unless you change it to simmer the pot boils over and what you have is a big mess!

So when you feel distressed don’t go to a therapist call your childhood self-pull out some Crayola crayons and have a nice talk over Barbie’s and make-believe tea!

You’ll be amazed how they can teach adult you, the secret to being happy!

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